30 Simple Things To Say To Get More Love

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relationship coachingIt is said that actions speak louder than words, and in many cases I agree, but the words we use can hold a lot of power too.

With only words we can build someone up or tear them down. We can bring smiles, or sadness. And simply by opening our mouths and forming a combination of words we can create love, or destroy it.

Our words can have immense power, including the power to bring us more of what we want, and less of what we don’t.

But just as it’s easy to forget to show your partner you love them through your actions, it’s also easy to forget to use the right words to clearly express exactly how you feel about someone, and leave absolutely no doubt about how much you love and appreciate them.

Sadly, as time goes by in many relationships it’s often the default to use words to criticize, blame, judge or nag. Or if none of those are your style, perhaps it’s just that you’ve got so caught up in the day-to-day conversations about the bills, work, the dog, the kids and what’s for dinner, that there’s little space left for words of love.

Life gets busy and it can get in the way if you let it. But the great thing is that the words you can say to your partner to create more love in your relationship don’t take long to say, and don’t have to be carefully crafted poetic odes of love.

There’s no need to start memorizing the prose of Keats or Wordsworth, or try to construct your own over the top, exaggerated and gushy declarations of love. All you have to do is practice giving the small, but incredibly valuable gift of loving words.

It’s that easy, yet so often ignored as a pathway to increased love and intimacy.

There are too many false beliefs that love is about grand gestures, never fighting, always having great sex, receiving flowers, expensive dates and being the only person your partner ever looks at.

But real love, true deep love, is built on foundations much stronger, yet more simple than any of that, and being able to openly and lovingly communicate your appreciation and respect for your partner is right there at the core of what love is really all about.

So, what are these magical words that can bring you more love?

As I’ve said, there’s nothing particularly magical about them at all, they are super simple and if you have language skills beyond those of the average 8 year old, you have all of the words you need already, without me telling you what to say.

But in case you don’t know quite where to start, here’s 30 examples of putting together a few simple words, which can make all the difference to how loved your partner feels.

  1. Thank you
  1. I’m sorry
  1. I really appreciated it when you did/said that.
  1. It’s times like this when I feel even closer to you.
  1. I’m so in love with you
  1. I’m so proud of you.
  1. You look handsome/beautiful/gorgeous/sexy/stunning tonight.
  1. How you feel/what you want/your opinion is important to me.
  1. I love you more with every day.
  1. I miss you when you’re not around.
  1. I trust you to do what’s right/make the right decision/sort this out.
  1. I feel so proud being your wife/husband/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner.
  1. You are the best mother/father I could choose for my children.
  1. You are my best friend.
  1. There’s no one else for me, but you.
  1. You’re so clever/smart/funny/helpful/loving.
  1. That’s just another reason I love you.
  1. You make me so happy.
  1. Every time I see your face I still smile.
  1. I love the way you love me.
  1. You handled that really well.
  1. I love being intimate with you.
  1. I always feel safe when you hold me.
  1. You are my hero
  1. I was wrong when I said/did that.
  1. I am so grateful to have met you.
  1. I love seeing you smile.
  1. Loving you is easy.
  1. I forgive you.
  1. I am here for you, no matter what.

Most of these sentiments are simple and might even seem a bit cliché but trust me they work. The reason they work is because they feed the inherent need most of us have to be noticed, valued, appreciated, respected and loved.

And when someone nurtures these feelings in us, we can’t help but feel more love in return.

So, perhaps it’s time for you to start choosing your words wisely, and letting some simple words do the work for you?

I can absolutely promise that response you get will be worth the effort.

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  1. Pingback: Loving In Your Partner's Shoes | Rachael Lay

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